wtf, best conversation ever
Megazord: I've just been invited to play shows with Aria C Jalali
Tom: I do not know who that is
Megazord: I think he's a friend of Greg's who's kinda big
Tom: so then, this is a good thing
Megazord: Greg knows a lot of important people
Tom: I wish I knew important people.
Megazord: important people knew you
Megazord: he sent me his EP which I'm going to review
Megazord: and then he was like, I like yr chunes
Megazord: so now we're talking about playing together
Megazord: thanks myspace
Tom: he just randomly sent you his own ep?
Megazord: no like
Megazord: he said "who wants to review my new ep, I'll send you an advance copy"
Megazord: so I'm in newspaper so I would
Megazord: and then I really liked it and told him that
Megazord: and now it's like we're dating
Tom: wow...that's great. congrats. I'm still lonely and wanting to die
Tom: in other words
Megazord: TOM YOU SHOULD JOIN MEGAZORD
Tom: I don't even know
Tom: I should
Megazord: TOUR THE WEST COAST
Megazord: NOT BE LONELY AND WANTING TO DIE
Megazord: MEET COOL PEOPLE
Tom: I don't have any music to play
Megazord: SMOKE TREES
Megazord: maybe not the last one
Megazord: I wasn't sure if you were into that
Megazord: you can be my percussionist
Megazord: or my personal dj
Megazord: spin those tunes dj tom
Megazord: I just wnat to help
Megazord: I'm here to help
Tom: send me a female clone of myself...I've basically boiled down that the perfect woman for me is either my ex girlfriend or a female version of myself, except white.
Tom: and busty
Megazord: I know some people in the industry
Megazord: I'll call them up Tom
Megazord: remember when Oprah brought those people who could show her what she would look like if she were white?
Megazord: my friends dad owns the company
Megazord: I'll get right on it tom
Megazord: ok I'm lying
Megazord: I'm not sure if you coudl tell
Megazord: but lies make things better, right?
Tom: I wish
Megazord: at least until you find out they're lies
Tom: I'm too skeptical to even believe in the truth
Tom: much less lies
Megazord: don't trust shit
Megazord: I don'
Megazord: I don't like putting my fate in the hands of other people
Tom: yeah, but that's basically what has lead me to this state of unhappiness
Megazord: you need to find somthing to do
Megazord: something that will help you meet new people
Megazord: like a new hobby
Megazord: like knitting or bowling or something
Megazord: not kidding about this
Megazord: it will get you in a new environment
Megazord: and you might be happier and meet newer people
Tom: but I'm already skeptical. I just assume that everyone I meet is a complete dumbass with no original thought and is as deep as the sole of their shoe.
Megazord: well that's easy to believe since a lot of people are like that
Megazord: but I think that too and that's why I haven't gotten with anyone
Megazord: I'm skeptical as fuck and don't trust shit
Megazord: so you have to put that aside and see if you can meet someone
Megazord: if it doesn't work out
Megazord: then at least you learned how to knit or bowl
Tom: I already know how to do those things.
Megazord: you do :(????
Tom: yeah. I was in a bowling league for three years
Tom: and my grandma taught me how to knit.
Megazord: I wish I knew how to do either of those things
Megazord: become an alcoholic
Tom: I hate the taste of alcohol.
Megazord: meet some hot girls at alocholics anonymous
Megazord: ok maybe that was a joke
Megazord: a bad one
Tom: those kind of women are shallow sluts.
Megazord: they're probably meth heads as well
Tom: I think all women are basically shallow sluts.
Tom: except for the ugly ones, they're just desperate
Megazord: you can say that to about 99% of them
Megazord: that's like 98% of the shallow sluts
Tom: my ex-girlfriend was like the sliver .01% that wasn't a shallow slut, but wasn't ugly as fuck.
Megazord: why did you guys split
Tom: well, we had an unstable relationship because of me and my goddamn trust issues
Tom: we've broken up like 6+ times
Megazord: oh man
Tom: in the course of two or three years
Megazord: those relationships can be kinda forced
Megazord: if you go through that many breakups and get togethers
Tom: yeah, I don't know.
Tom: anyway, she and I are meeting tomorrow for the last time, maybe ever.
Tom: I think I'll raep her
Megazord: good call
Megazord: how are you thinking about doing it
Megazord: because I think you can go buy some aquadots
Megazord: ghb is the daterape drug tom
Megazord: don't be coy
Tom: fuck no
Tom: no drugs man. i want her awake and aware and full of terror ;)
Tom: that's my catch line
Megazord: aquadots were the chidlrens toy that were made with ghb because the chinese ran out of materials so the children swallowed them and passsed out and threw them up
Megazord: well it's a good line to live by
Megazord: are you thinking like bondage
Megazord: like Cannibal Holocaust
Tom: oh god
Tom: that film
Megazord: the last scene
Megazord: with the white girl
Megazord: I love how they resort to beating everyone with rocks
Tom: god, i don't think i could do anything as terrible as what was depicted in that film
Megazord: that film was ridiculous
Megazord: did you ever watch Gay niggers from outer space?
Megazord: sounds like a greg movie
Megazord: but it's real
Tom: dude, we're on a tangent. I want to talk to you about raeping
Megazord: GET IN ON
Tom: well, I was thinking about tying her down, stuff her mouth with her panties AND cumming inside her and maybe jamming a candlestick up her asshole.
Megazord: so no pooping on her chest?
Megazord: because that's a whole nother level
Tom: I was thinking maybe smearing her face with shit instead of her chest
Megazord: does she have any pets?
Tom: no turtles
Megazord: oh because I was going to suggest raping the pets in front of her
Tom: I was thinking, maybe, peeing in her ear
Megazord: GET HER A CAT TOMORROW
Megazord: and rape it when you rape her
Megazord: pee in her hair
Megazord: no wait
Megazord: pee on her face
Megazord: shit in her hair
Megazord: and rub it all in
Megazord: won't be able to get that smell out for years
Tom: I want to pee up her nose
Megazord: that's just gross
Megazord: that's like
Megazord: not cool
Tom: so it drips down her throat
Megazord: JUST PEE IN HER MOUTH THEN
Tom: no way
Tom: my way is way cooler
Megazord: o lawdz tom
Tom: besides, I've already raeped her
Megazord: am I going to see in the morning news how you were found doing this
Tom: no need to pussyfoot around it
Megazord: o lawdz
Tom: I will make headlines
Megazord: will you kill her and then perform harakiri?
Tom: fuck no
Megazord: aw man
Tom: she'll have to live with the psychological suffering for the rest of her life
Megazord: usually the peope at the top stop before they turn to shit
Tom: and I'll enjoy the rest of my life
Megazord: oh ok
Megazord: o my tom
Megazord: is 4chan your homepage by any chance?
Tom: 4chan is too conservative
Tom: all the good shit are on websites in japan and russia
Megazord: oh like 2ch?
Tom: oh christian, you're such a naive young man
Megazord: I'm afraid for my life now
Megazord: you probably know where I live
Megazord: you've probably gotten my IP
Megazord: you probably know my whole life story
Megazord: just don't DDoS me Tom
Tom: I've revealed too much already
Megazord: now you have to kill me don't you
Tom: I'll leave that up to MT
Megazord: is he in on this as well?
Tom: you may THINK that he's an innocent guy who loves cheesy indie-pop
Tom: but boy, sometimes, he puts my works of raep to shame
Megazord: LOL FUCK
Megazord: IS THAT WHY HE DOESN'T POST ANYMORE
Megazord: HE FOUND THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE ONLY TO GO TORTURE HER
Megazord: SNUFF FILMS
Megazord: ARE YOU INTO THAT SHIT TOM
Tom: well, I did write and direct 8MM 2
Tom: I'm just that evil
Megazord: or just that desparate
Megazord: GIVE IT UP TOP
Megazord: ITS THE POLICE
Megazord: we've got everything we need to throw yr ass in jail
Megazord: mr seim
Tom: I'm actually protected by international law. I'm not a citizen of the United States.
Megazord: oh you son of a bitch
Megazord: this is just like lethal weapon 4
Tom: yes...how coincidental...
Megazord: oh no
Megazord: you don't mean
Tom: Yes, that's right
Tom: I wrote and directed lethal weapon 4
Megazord: well can you tell me if there will be a LW5?
Megazord: I've really been wanting to see a new one
Tom: I'm leaving that one up to Dean
Tom: that's his favorite movie series
Megazord: DEAN IS ON THIS TOO?
Megazord: don't even tell me Jessi is involved
Tom: not really
Tom: she's like Neo...she weaves in and out of reality
Megazord: oh my
Megazord: how far down the rabbit hole have I gon
Tom: not far enough my friend, not far enough. But alas, I must disappear. Goodbye
Megazord: so many questions I have
Tom: next time.
Q: WHO MIGHT BE OPENING FOR ARIA C. JALALI THIS DECEMBER???? A: ME R: WUTTTTTTTTTTTT
Max Tundra - Will Get Fooled Again Jesus this man...
If you’re in the mood for Astral Projection then it’s your lucky day!– What Is Your Single Biggest Question About Astral Projection? (via popmechanic) Hahahaha
Gary Wilson - Gary’s in the Park probably...
I CAN’T WAIT UNTIL CHRISTMAS
I LOVE TO SPARKLE
I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE I LOVE TO SPARKLE
I have the hiccups and I want to take a bubble bath, so let’s make this snappy.– ME (via smallz)
Hodge-podge fuck shit I have a text– Molly being interviewed
How many orphans have you saved today? None, so I don’t give shit– Molly telling me how Doritos save orphans
DON’T GIVE A FUCK
OK so on thursday I headed over to Buff Castle to do some shit I needed to do I returned a shirt which was too small and gave him another one that he could screenprint on, so I hope that turns out amazing (I’m sure it will) got a CD burnt of Fired Down! which is rave music slowed down and super crazy I bought the new Stag Hare album Black Medicine Magic which has to be close to the...
NEW YACHT EP
DATS RITE INNERNETTE NEW YACHT EP OFF DFA?!?!?! ITZ TRU WUT U SAY GURL I SAY WUT I MEEN AND I MEEN WUT I SAY
WELL as of late I’ve been trying to put a show together for Magic Johnson/Don Hellion with little luck Liz hasn’t called me back to tell me if it’s cool for them to play so I think i’m going to call her soon. I’m waiting patiently for 0385204682467 things I’ve ordered and can’t wait here. I’ve started waking up at 6 so I can get used to it ...
The next to last weekend of summer '08
smallz: Christian called and talked about how fucking cool and badass he was smoking his dad’s cigar in the car as he got pizza, and I was totally and completely in awe. AWESOME
COOL KIDZ THRAD
Yesterday… I didn’t do anything until afternoon I believe I told the internet about the quarter with a hole I got then I put it in an envelope with some photos and the quarter and decorated it then zac called back and said he’d be here in 10 and I was like nooooooooooo, come back in 30 and he was like 20 and I was like okkkkkkkk but i better do stuff fastttttt then I took a...
YO, THIS WILL MATTER →
I just got this total wave of sadness. I had a really good day. I caught up with my BFF from kindergarten, gave Diego a haircut, cleaned the bathroom, and meditated with Aidan. But now I’m listening to Tom Waits and I just got a text from my ex boyfriend that just said, “I moved out.” I just got this utter sense that I’m losing contact with so many people that I care about so deeply. That is...
Today I listened to a bunch of E-603/White Fang My Oktomat broke, but luckily I have the receipt so I can get money back instead of gross UO credit (I CANT BELIEVE I JUST ADMITTED THAT) Sent in 2 more roles to get developed, I expect 4 within the next week Am about to finish Native Son, these last 50 pages are retarded I had a bean and shrimp burrito for breakfast I didn’t have lunch ...
I had a dream my worst enemy got fat, it was a loly dream from what I remember